To Be Like the Father

“Then little children were brought to Him that He might put His hands on them and pray, but the disciples rebuked them. But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven.” And He laid His hands on them…” Matthew 19:13-15a

The kitchen is the hub of my home. Each day I teach my children there, cook there, even my laptop is there. The rest of the house could blow away and we would probably be just fine as long as the kitchen (and at least one bathroom) stayed put.

As you probably have deduced from my description, the very fact that I was alone in this room one day this week is a highly unusual thing. Anyway, I was alone and enjoying every minute of it. My hands were busy making calzone rolls and my ears were catching an entire episode of Focus on the Family. Life was about perfect. Then I heard it - the sound of feet on the stairs and a little voice.

“Mommyyyyyyyy….”

The irritation was instant. “How aggravating! Here I am with a little bit of time, finally, to be alone and someone needs me.” For the love of Pete – can’t they ever leave me alone?!!”

Cue the voice of God.

“When is the last time you came to Me and I responded with irritation?”

Ouch.

As a parent, I am a representation of the Lord to my children. One of my most important jobs is to teach them about the Father’s love, compassion, patience, mercy, judgment, righteousness and even righteous anger. If I react with irritation and frustration when a child comes to me with a need, what does that say about the Lord - the One I am teaching them to pray to about everything that concerns them?

My goal is to change my reactions to my precious children to reflect the reactions of my heavenly Father to me, His precious child. He is always fair, full of love, just and merciful, firm and decisive in His correction and punishment, always willing to forgive and give good gifts. He is never too busy to hear me or to answer. I want to be like Him.

“When Jesus heard what had happened [the murder of John the Baptist], He withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place. Hearing of this, the crowds followed Him on foot from the towns. When Jesus landed and saw a large crowd, He had compassion on them and healed their sick. Matthew 14:13-14

Prayer:

Father, thank You for your consistent love for me. Thank you for always being there when I come to You with a need. Please help me to ever mindful of the privilege of reflecting You to my children. Amen.

Challenge:

Watch for opportunities this week to act in the character of God in your relationships. Search the Scriptures for examples of the Lord’s reaction to sin, need, etc. 

Jen G. 2010

My Ugly Pet

Due to a very busy week, I am reposting an old favorite of mine. I pray that it ministers to you!

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I have a pet. This pet demands my attention and sucks the energy right out of me; it pains my heart and causes me much shame and guilt as I constantly have to clean up after it. In spite of this, I sort of love this pet. It must be love considering the manner in which I treat it. I snuggle with it and feed it and hide it from exposure. When it is threatened with death I do just about everything in my power to keep it with me. I pray for it to die quietly with no pain so I do not have to make the decision to put it out of its misery. Sometimes I even hope we can go on living together always, avoiding the pain of giving up something I have grown comfortable with in spite of its irritation to me.
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The name of this hideous, ugly, time consuming pet is…SIN. Sin certainly becomes a pet. Worry, overeating, gossip, discontentedness, resistance to authority, anger, criticalness, holding offences and a myriad of other things demand our time and energy each day. The Scriptures are clear that these things are against God’s plan for us and yet we hang on tight to them many times. We do so because it is comfortable. Let’s be totally honest. We would not be continuing in these patterns of unchecked sin if we did not get some feeling that we liked from them. Sometimes sin is fun, but in the end it pays poorly. Proverbs 14:12
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If you are not certain what your personal ugly pet is – and I promise you that EVERYONE has at least one – call out to the Lord as David did in Psalm 139:23 and 24. “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” The Lord will show you your sin because He wants you to be holy as He is holy. He wants you to live a life of freedom and peace. Without His holiness we cannot be effective in our witness to our families and the world around us.
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Once we identify our not-so-cute Kujo, how do we go about killing it? God’s Word tells us that, “Those who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.” Proverbs 28:13 We must first confess that we have these closely held critters and then we must turn from them. We have a choice and making the right choice has a wonderful outcome – mercy, freedom and righteous living. (Romans 6:16) We do not need to be in bondage to our sin. If we belong to Christ His life giving Spirit has freed us from the power of sin! (Romans 8:2) His Word promises that “…letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.” Romans 8:6 So…go slay that snarling pet sin and live in freedom!
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Prayer:
Father, please show me the ugly pet sins in my spiritual life. Give me the strength and determination I need to put them out of my heart and life. Thank You for the conviction of the Holy Spirit and Your patient love. Amen.
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Challenge:
Ask a friend or your husband to help you identify ugly pet sins. Ask them to hold you accountable and then be open to their observations.
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Jen 2007

The Theology of Feet

Once again, I am delighted to share a devotional by my friend from Provision Farm. This article was slightly edited for length. You can read it in its entirety here.

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The most common problem I have ever encountered when I'm looking at someone else's goats is their feet. Many, many people don't trim their hooves often enough. Needless to say, they will grow grossly long and affect how they walk. People have given me their goats in the past (yes, I know, don't look a gift goat in the mouth, right?) and I consistently take notice of the fact that these goats often have seriously deformed feet.
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Let me take a moment to admit that I'm very particular about this issue. The first thing I do when I get a new animal is to trim its feet and give it wormer. Every spring, I catch my sheep and do this, as well. My goats get their hooves trimmed probably every couple of weeks, though. To me, it is one of the easiest things and one of the most beneficial things you can do. To keep a set of feet standing flat on the ground is to set the whole animal straight. The feet are quite literally the foundation.
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When I think of the implications of overgrown hooves, I think of my own laziness over proper 'trimming' in my life. This world is filthy and corrupt and I'm not impervious to its vices. If I don't consistently prune back my flesh, my entire alignment will be off. If I allow more of me to grow, I will by my very nature begin to trap junk on the inside of me. Pressing this corrupting matter close to myself, will in turn corrupt my insides. Trimming back my excess will expose what's pressing against me so it can easily fall away instead of becoming trapped to my insides. Allowing too much of me to grow will also simply offset a healthy balance in my life. Something so small as a hoof can throw off the conformation of the entire animal. To compensate for the malformation, the rest of the body must malform itself. I have found that if I allow myself to become less like the image of Christ and more like the image of selfishness, it affects everything around me. My malformation becomes the malformation of my entire sphere of influence. O woe is me when I not only cause myself to stumble, but those around me!
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Romans 8:28-31 says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those he predestined he also called; those he called he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified. What then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?"
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I come to my goats with a pair of hoof trimmers in my hand. I come to trim away their excess so their feet may be conformed to the image of correctness. Their feet were designed to be a certain way, same as we were created and predestined to be conformed to the image of Christ. Trimming their hooves is much like the 'justification process' we undergo as sons and daughters of God. When we have submitted to the Lord's trimming, we can stand strong. When we have the image of correctness (Christ), who can stand against us? The answer is 'no one'.
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Submit to the Lord. Stand strong. Stumbling will become less of a reality if we do this.

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Prayer:

Father, help me to be mindful of what needs trimming in my life. Give me Your eyes to see what is overgrown and affecting my walk with You and my witness to others. Amen.

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Challenge:

Be mindful of the Scriptures that call you to holiness. This week, keep in mind the righteousness of the Lord and strive to walk in His likeness.

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Adrienne 2010

Are You a Lemon?

We had a car once that needed to have constant repair service. If it was not one thing, it was another. Parts were always breaking and needing to be replaced or treated in some way. It was expensive; it was high maintenance. It was expensive and frustrating to own such a car! Most of us call those kinds of cars lemons.

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I have found that people are very similar in a way. So the question is: are YOU a high or low maintenance kind of person? That is a pretty scary question isn’t it? None of us want to admit that we might be a high maintenance person. How do we know what a high maintenance person looks like? Here are some clues:

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• they are focused on their “feelings or emotions” (what others say to them, how they say it to them)
• they need constant verbal praise to carry on whatever task they are doing
• they are often “wounded” by others
• offended easily
• always need to “talk” about something that is bothering them
• pout to get attention and are angry if they do not get the attention

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In other words, high maintenance people are roller coaster personalities and emotionally exhausting to relate with because they require so much attention. I think you get the picture.

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Does this describe you? If it does, don’t despair! The word of God gives us some very practical solutions to help us change. In Colossians 3: 1–5 we are told to set our minds on things above and not on the things on the earth. We are told to consider the members of our earthly bodies as dead. Skip down to verses 8–17 and we see what we are to put off and what to put on. I think the key here is to practice the "put ons" starting in verse 12. These "put ons" are a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other…..just as the Lord forgave you. Verse 14 tells us to put on love.

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If we would apply these few verses our lives would begin to be transformed. Not only do they help those us who may be high maintenance ourselves to overcome, but it will help those of us who have to deal with high maintenance people treat them with love and kindness. God is amazing isn’t He?
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Prayer: Lord, the last thing I want is for others to feel like I am a high maintenance person. Please help me to overcome and to grow up into Christ in all things. Help me as I practice the put offs and put ons listed in Colossians. 3. Teach me to set my mind on things above and to make Jesus Christ Lord of my life in all ways. Thank you.

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Challenge: Begin to take notice of how you relate to others and ask the Lord to open your eyes to your status of maintenance requirements.
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Sherry 2010

Is Your Husband on the Roof?

I am so excited to introduce a new contributor to Fresh Starts. Alexis is a blogger writes the wonderful, heart touching, soul convicting Faithful Rubies Daily Devotionals. You can be blessed daily by visiting http://faithfulrubies.blogspot.com and signing up to receive these gems in your inbox.

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Better to live on a corner of a roof
than share a house with a
quarrelsome wife.
Proverbs 25:25

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Imagine for a minute going on a month long vacation which turns into a life changing move. Not only do you not return to your hometown to say good-bye to friends and family but you also do not return to pack up your house. Instead your husband makes the 2000 mile return trip home to pack up everything and close out your life in your hometown. For over 2 months you and your three kids live with family, a month of which is without your spouse. Imagine the stress, the exhaustion, and the emotional toll that scenario might take on you.
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I do not have to imagine, I am living this reality. What started as a month long vacation to find work for my husband has turned into a life-long move from my hometown of over 30 years. This move had been anticipated but not quite so quickly. Soon after my husband returned home my stress level sky rocketed. I was so stressed that I was bickering with my husband over the phone almost daily. We do not argue very often so I knew something was astray within myself. As I searched for help and guidance in scripture I came across Proverbs 25:25.
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This proverb rings true for me on so many levels. Ponder the depth of this verse for a moment. Think of the impact and relevance it has in your own life and marriage. A quarrelsome wife has not only the power and ability to make her husband leave his home but he might think it better to live on the roof than to live with her. Living in the cold and exposing himself to the elements on top of a hard roof top is better than being in the same room as his cranky wife. Living on a roof top is figurative of course, but you get the point.
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The husband and father is the backbone to every family; the leader, the spiritual guide. His place is not on the roof forced there by an angry wife. Has this ever been you? Be honest with yourself. I know I am guilty! Personally it breaks my heart and brings me to my knees in prayer when I realize I am a thorn in my husband's side. Our husbands do so much for us everyday, we should shower them with thanks and appreciation.
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From 2000 miles away I was forcing my husband to sleep on the roof. Shame on me! Thankfully, I have been able to change my ways and we are no longer arguing. Now my kids and I are eagerly awaiting his safe arrival in our new hometown in a few weeks.
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Prayer:
Dear Heavenly Father, please forgive me of my sins and shortsightedness. O Lord, it is not my desire to be argumentative. I do not enjoy quarreling with my husband. O Father, please give me the strength and wisdom to change my heart, my actions, and my mind. Father I want to align my thoughts and actions according to Your will. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
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Challenge:
What is something you can do today to improve your attitude toward your husband? How can you show him that you appreciate his hard work? Don't just think it, do it!

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Alexis 2010

Ugly Pride

Let’s talk about pride.

According to Webster’s 1828 Dictionary, pride is an inordinate self-esteem; an unreasonable conceit of one's own superiority in talents, beauty, wealth, accomplishments, rank or elevation in office, which manifests itself in lofty airs, distance, reserve, and often in contempt of others.

At times I am a walking definition of this ugly word. Proverbs 13:10 says, “By pride comes nothing but strife, but with the well-advised is wisdom.” There are times when my home is filled with strife. Often that strife originates with me when I become angry when a little person does not follow my instructions. Instead of reacting in anger, I should be grieved in my heart because my child is walking in disobedience that will affect his or her relationship with the Lord. My pride has elevated my inconvenience over the holiness of the Lord. If I am well-advised (spending time in the Word), I will have the wisdom to avoid the pride and in return, the strife.

Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? James 4:1

The Word is crystal clear on the source of all arguments and strife. It all comes from pride. My personal desire for pleasure (what makes my life easier, what makes me comfortable, what makes me look good) causes fights and quarrels. Of course, my family also contributes to this atmosphere. However, I have a responsibility to respond in a godly way. Once again, if I am being well-advised by the Scriptures I will know how to respond and handle the situations that arise with my children and husband. Pride is a personal issue for which I must take responsibility, working towards walking in humility like Jesus.

Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up. James 4:10

Prayer:
Father, please forgive me for walking in pride, seeking in my own way and comfort. Help me to be aware of my part in strife that arises in my home. I desire to be a woman of peace. Amen

Challenge:
Keep your eyes open for pride in your life this week. Look at the definition above carefully. Make note of all the ways pride manifests itself: lofty airs, distancing oneself, reserve, lofty looks. The next time you have a spat with your husband, stop and examine your motives and reactions. Remember, all fights come from pride. If you die to yourself, there is no way an argument can continue! Be prepared, dying to yourself is painful and frustrating, but the end result is wonderful!

Jen 2010

Lazy Excuses

As a little girl growing up in Dothan, Alabama, I attended a church concert at Mt. Gilead Baptist Church. The vocalist was about eleven years old and had the best enunciation I had ever heard and the biggest red hair I had every seen. Other than those two incredibly useless facts, I only remember two other things about the evening. It was hot, and the girl sang a cover song called Excuses. Part of the chorus went, “Excuses, excuses, you hear them every day! Well, the devil, he’ll supply them, if from the church you’ll stay away!” Add a great twang and you have the gist of the evening. Excuses, however, are not just used for skipping regular fellowship with other believers. Just about anything can conjure up an excuse.
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Excuse (noun)
1. A false reason that enables somebody to do something he or she wants to do or avoid something he or she does not want to do
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I firmly believe that many times my excuses are basically a cover for plain old laziness. A lack of self control over my temper is really a sign that I am too lazy to do the hard thing and use that particular fruit of the spirit. Making excuses for missed devotional time is simply a lazy streak in the faithfulness department. The overflowing ironing basket is a result of my lazy choice to sit and read instead of finishing my work.
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The good news is that I do not have to continue making excuses! I can diligently seek to be a good manager of my home, a woman characterized by a gentle manner and wisdom that comes from consistent time in the Word. There is no excuse for any form of sin in my life because the Lord has faithfully made a way for me to avoid it. If you are an excuse maker, there is hope for you as well in the perfect and complete Word of God!
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The soul of a lazy man desires, and has nothing; But the soul of the diligent shall be made rich. Proverbs 13:4
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Prayer:
Father, thank You that I do not have to live a life filled with excuses. I can rest on the promise that the soul of the diligent shall be made rich with the treasure of You! Amen.
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Challenge:
Examine your life closely this week and see if you have fallen into the habit of making excuses, whether it is missing church because you need to catch up on yard work or leaving the grocery cart parked aimlessly in the middle of the store parking lot. Ask the Lord to show you how your excuses are affecting your testimony and His image. Look at the Word to see what sin your excuse is making room for in your life.
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Jen 2009

The Idol of Self

For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. James 3:16
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When my children were born I knew that being a mother would be hard work. I knew there would be long nights and bad days, a ton of laundry, and changes in what dinner looked like at our house. And yet, when life really did get hard I was completely shocked. Suddenly what I wanted or needed no longer mattered. Who cared if mommy liked lentils and rice? No one else did, so apparently it was a yucky meal. Who cared if mommy liked Pollyanna? No one else did, so it was a banned movie. Who cared if mommy hated the beach? No one else did, so it was a favorite destination. No one else seemed to see the value of a nap, a quiet hour, wiped off counters, or chicken noodle casserole.
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The idea that what I wanted really was a mute point was maddening. After all, I am the mommy. And if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy!
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I was bowing to the idol of self. The idol of self is the idea that my needs, wants, and desires are so important that others have no business getting in the way of those things. Getting interrupted during my quiet time brought harsh words and looks of disapproval. Sleeping late was more important than my children getting a good breakfast. My like of certain foods was worth others literally going hungry for the night. Plain and simple, this idol is the sin of selfishness and self seeking.
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James tells us that where self seeking exists, confusion and every evil thing are there. It is true! Think of the last time you insisted that your way was the only way. I am certain that peace was not permeating the atmosphere. In my own experience tempers flared and feelings were hurt.
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But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. James 3:17,18
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Some might worry that dying to self means teaching children that they are the center of the universe. On the contrary! I am in no way saying that we only cook what our children like or never have rules or discipline. I am saying that our response to situations speaks volumes on what we think of Jesus and His example. Jesus came to serve. He did not crab about washing feet, cooking dinner - on the beach no less, fixing broken things (think of Peter and the guy’s ear in the garden), or dying for something He did not do. He was always available to talk and minister, even when He was trying to get away and be alone for a while. Matthew 14:12-14 He had wisdom from above and lived in that wisdom daily.
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When I insist on living my life as though I am the most important I teach my children to live as if THEY are the most important. I live an example of self seeking and selfishness that is easily learned by impressionable little people. There is a much better way, however. It is not easy by any means, but the fruit it yields is so much more desirable. I need to ditch the self seeking stuff and grab the wisdom from above!

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Prayer:

Father, I desire to be like Jesus, a cheerful servant to all who glorifies You in everything. Please help me to walk in the patience and self control that is mine in Your Holy Spirit. Let my life be an example of Christ likeness to my little ones.

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Challenge:

This week be mindful of times when the idol of self demands your attention. When that rises up it is a sure sign that you need to do the opposite of what you feel - not an easy thing, but possible! Remember to walk in selfless-ness cheerfully or it really doesn't count!

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I highly recommend the book Age of Opportunity by Paul David Tripp. Although this book is marketed to those with children entering or already in the teen years I believe it is vital reading for all parents, regardless of the age of their children.

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Jen Gorton 2009