Necessary Doors

Recently, my husband and I encountered a tough situation that hurt our hearts and confused our minds.  In the midst of questioning why we were facing such a mountain, this comment was made:

“Why does it sometimes seem as if God is playing tricks on His children?”

You know the feeling – you are working hard at being an awesome spouse, a perfect parent, a faithful friend, and a hardworking servant in ministry.  Then BAM!  Something totally unexpected slams into your life, creating confusion and doubt and fear.  Sometimes anger rushes in, and you wonder why someone who has tried so hard to live for the Lord would be ‘repaid’ in such a way.  Why would a good and loving God choose to allow such heartache in a believer’s life?  The temptation to withdraw your faith in the Lord is strong; after all, He did not follow through with your plans.

Ahhhh….but it is not our faith, or lack thereof, that makes God faithful and good.  The Lord’s faithfulness never changes; His goodness never lessens.  He is GOD.  Our feelings do not change who He is.

For what if some did not believe? Will their unbelief make the faithfulness of God without effect?  Certainly not! Indeed, let God be true but every man a liar.  Romans 3:3, 4

The hard things we go through serve as necessary doors.  It is so very easy to glorify the Lord when our bellies are full and our babies are healthy; it is another thing altogether when our children abandon Truth and our husbands are suffering from a horrible disease.  To honor the Lord fully and to glorify Him above all else, we must walk through that door of pain, hardship, or hurt.  Across the threshold is a greater knowledge of the faithfulness of the Lord as we look back and see how He guided us through those trials and tribulations.

Beloved, do not think it strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened to you; but rejoice to the extent that you partake of Christ’s sufferings, that when His glory is revealed, you may also be glad with exceeding joy…. Therefore let those who suffer according to the will of God commit their souls to Him in doing good, as to a faithful Creator. 1 Peter 4:12 & 13, 19

Job, the godliest man of his time, went through hell on earth.  If anyone had a reason to jump the faith ship, it was he.  And yet this man said: “Shall we indeed accept good from God, and shall we not accept adversity?” (Job 2:10b) and “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.” (Job 13:15)  Read the book of Job to see how his story ends.

Are you willing to walk through the necessary doors to increase your faith and bring glory to the One who deserves all praise and honor?  The Lord promises to never leave you or forsake you.  As you turn the knob, you can trust that He is there with you.

Prayer

Father, thank You for Your goodness and faithfulness.  You are righteous and holy and just, never failing and always kind.  You allow hard things in our lives to bring us closer to You, the only One with the answers.  Thank You for giving us Truth in Your Word.  Amen.

Challenge

Allow the Lord to show you His faithfulness. Ask Him to open your eyes to His presence in the midst of the hard things.  During this recent trial, my husband and I asked friends to pray for us as they felt the Holy Spirit leading. We gave them zero details, not even a hint of what we were battling.  As they laid their hands on us, guess what were the very first words spoken? “God does not play tricks on His kids!” (See the opening of this devotional if you do not see the significance of these words!) God cared enough to prompt our intercessors to use the very words we spoke privately to one another.

While walking through trials, big or small, keep the Word front and center in your life.  It is only the Truth that will keep you from falling into unbelief and discouragement.

Jen G 2012

From the Vault: Treasure the Time

In honor of my only son's 15th birthday, I am reposting this devotion from 2008.  

When all of my children were under the age of five, I used to live for nap time, bed time, date night, and mom's nights out. Church was a huge delight, not for the great sermons, but for the free babysitting! Well...my baby just turned five and I am sitting here wondering why I rushed all of those beautiful years.

I started this mommyhood journey almost 15 (now 18) years ago. I can still clearly hear the voices of older moms encouraging me to enjoy every moment, no matter how loud, smelly, messy, or maddening it was. For the most part I think I tried to do that, but I know for certain I could have worked harder at it. I find myself grasping for memories of chubby bodies and infant cries. Not one of my children draws an unidentifiable picture anymore or needs help pouring a glass of water. I would give a mom's night out for a dirty diaper in a heartbeat!

The Lord only gives us a certain number of years to be a mommy of littles. Those little ones who were so tiny and helpless grow much faster than we can ever imagine. It is not a bad thing to spend time with other moms or go out alone with your husband. In fact, I strongly believe that those times are very important and vital to maintaining accountability and a strong marriage. It is also incredibly important to gratefully treasure each moment with your little people.

The Word tells us to be thankful in all things. Be thankful for the children who still need their mommy to help them go potty - or clean up the floor when they don't make it in time. Be thankful for the little cry during the night calling for you and no one else. Be thankful for Play-Doh crumbs and spilled juice. Soon enough all of that will be over and done with and you will be wondering why you rushed it or complained about it. I can tell you that from experience. The Lord called you, like Queen Esther, for such a time as this. He also called you for such a family as the one you have.

If you are struggling with the seemingly never ending days or you are feeling resentful of your children and their needs, I encourage you to spend time daily in the Word and prayer. The Word is the foundation that you can rebuild your thankful heart on.

Prayer:
Father, thank you for the little people you have blessed me with. Thank you for what you are teaching me about myself through them. Thank you that I am able to have children to care for. Thank you for all the messes and memories. Please help me to focus on the treasure my children are and to let them know each day how precious they are to me.


Challenge:
This week, choose to be thankful for each mess, diaper, cry, etc. Go out of your way to speak blessing over your children each day and tell them how thankful you are for them.  If your little ones are now teens, treasure each late night talk and quick hug.  Maybe you are an empty-nester.  If so, be sure to encourage moms who are struggling with seeing the purpose in the 'endless' days.

Jen Gorton 2008

Continued Break

The intention was to begin Fresh Starts in August after a one month break.  I need to simply take my own advice  and continue this vacation for an undetermined length of time.  Just think, each Monday you can hold your breath not knowing if that will be the week Fresh Starts returns. :-)  Sort of like waiting for a check in the mail...

Please pray that during this time the Lord will speak and give fresh words with me to share.

Blessings,

Jen

"No, we're not in a hurry...."

Mrs. B 2011

Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Psalm 127:3

As a veteran homeschooling mom, I have known this verse for years and years, as you have, too, no doubt. It is one of the verses that makes our hearts glad when we reflect on the children the Lord has given to us. But yet, even in my older age, this verse has come alive for me again, bringing change to my heart.

My husband and I had the privilege of spending our first Christmas as guardians of our new child. When we became guardians this summer, my husband bought a balloon for me that said, "It's a Boy!" I was thrilled. The Lord only gave one biological child to my husband and me, so becoming the legal guardian of this boy has caused me much joy. It has caused me to reflect anew on how wonderful it is to be a parent or guardian of a precious gift from the Lord Himself. It has also caused me to reflect anew on how wonderful it is to watch a child bring change to hearts.

This really struck me on Christmas morning. The three of us were going to have Christmas lunch with family, so we needed to get up early to get there in time to open presents, too. I started the shower for my new son to make sure the water was not too hot. He took his shower on his own, but after this, I watched over him as he brushed his teeth to make sure he did not miss any spots. I helped him tuck his shirt in properly and saw to it that he did not missed any belt loops, as he often does.

I helped him put lotion and medicine on his feet, then helped with his socks (he wanted to put his shoes on by himself). I gave his medicine to him and served him the breakfast I made for us. As he sat down to eat, he looked at me with the sweetest eyes and asked me in a most sincere voice, “Are we in a hurry this morning?”

That question pierced my heart. With our first son, I remember always being in a hurry – there was always something to get done, always somewhere to go, always something that seemed to pull my attention away from the “gift” sitting before me. And here was another son sitting before me, voicing what the first one never could.

For you see, my new charge, the one I am now the legal guardian over, is my elderly uncle who has been mentally handicapped from birth. His mental capabilities put him on par with a five or six-year old -- he cannot read or write. For all practical purposes, he is and always will be a “boy.” But despite this mental age, the Lord allowed him to ask me an unknowingly loaded question that has the potential to change me.

So, I looked into those eyes and said, “No, we are not in a hurry this morning.” Was I in a hurry? Yes. Were we in a hurry? No. I asked the Lord for patience as I waited for him to finish his breakfast (biting my lip so that I did not tell him to hurry), as I waited for him to get his coat on (taking a deep breath to keep my cool), and as I waited for him to walk slowly and carefully to the car (as some 71 year-old men do). We, of course, arrived where we needed to go with time to spare.

The little ones you dress and feed in your everyday life are asking the same question of you; they are just not at liberty to say it aloud, as my grown uncle was able to. The cry of his child-like heart (and their cry, too) was to sit and enjoy his breakfast with me, to stop hurrying. I want to change my responses this year. In my every day life, I want to be organized in the things that don’t matter so much so that I have time to invest in the things that matter greatly and eternally (and I want the wisdom to know the difference). I want to be able to say to everyone the Lord brings to spend time with me, “No, we are not in a hurry this morning.”

Prayer:

Dearest Lord, You looked up in the tree at Zacchaeus and invited him to spend time with You. You gently encouraged Martha to choose what Mary had chosen – to sit at Your feet. You took Your closest friends with You in a boat so that You could be with them. That meant You were willing to stop hurrying. Oh, Jesus, please put Your heart into my heart.

Challenge:

Re-read Luke 19:1-10 and teach your children a new song. In Sunday School years ago, I was taught to sing the Zacchaeus song by wagging my first finger at the little man in the tree and to say in a scolding voice, “Zacchaeus, you come DOWN…” At our home, we wave our hands in an invitation for the man to come down and sing, “Zacchaues, PLEASE come down, for I’m going to your house today…” That’s what the Lord’s heart is toward us. He invites us to sit at His feet and enjoy Him, to stop hurrying. May it be – in your home and mine.



Renewed by Him

Sometimes I get so overwhelmed with responsibilities that I feel like my head is about to spin completely around like the chick from that awful movie I was not allowed to watch as a child. You know the feeling: panic when you suddenly realize your are so busy that you could not fit an emergency room visit into the schedule, frustration because you have forgotten to buy toilet paper three days in a row, guilt because your children have eaten more carbs in the last week than they have since they were on solids.

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There are times when I can cut things from my schedule and bring relief; other times that is simply not an option. When those times come I am especially thankful for passages such as Isaiah 40:29-31: "He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."

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These verses encourage me to hope in the Lord as the only One Who will renew my strength. Extra vitamins, more sleep, faster exercise or fewer appointments might take the edge off, but only He can renew me completely and give me the strength I need to soar, run and walk through the pressures and responsibilities of the moment.

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Prayer:

Father, thank You that You have given me the strength to walk through the responsibilities I have at this time. Please help me to handle the pressure with grace, never bringing reproach on Your name when I feel rushed or overwhelmed. Amen

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Challenge:

If you are at a place where you simply can not take something off of the schedule, then take care to view your commitments as divine appointments. Allow the Lord to show you what He is wanting you to learn under pressure. Are you needing more patience, more kindness, more flexibility? Listen and learn!

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Maybe you are in this place all the time. If so, these articles might be an encouragement to you: The Buffet, Do You Shed?. If you are resenting the responsibilities you have with your family, Time Enough at Last will help you gain perspective.

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Jen 2010

Time Enough at Last

[title credit to the Twilight Zone episode of the same name.]
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I'm reading the book The Gift of a Year by Mira Kirshenbaum. She says something early in the book that seemed quite profound to me: "Time isn't our enemy. It's our home."
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God has seen fit to set our lives in Time. It looked pretty simple at the beginning: "And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and for years." Genesis 1:14
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In our twenty-first century world, Time can seem like an enemy. We scramble through our days, trying to get our tasks done before they bury us. We think it's bad when our children are little--too little sleep, too many "drudge-y" tasks. Every day looks the same: wake-up (change diapers), breakfast, lunch, naptime, supper, bedtime. Whew, made it through another day.
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When my children were little, my dear mother and mother-in-love both told me something that, though I "believed" true (because they said so), I could not possibly apprehend. "This is the easiest time you'll have while raising children." Those of you out of the infant/toddler/preschool age know what that means.
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Besides the unending running here and there of school-age children, there is the Worry Factor. We can expend a lot of time worrying, right? My mother-in-love Queen Darl says, "raising children is easier when they are all at home, tucked in bed at night."
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Add to the problem Technology. When I was growing up in the '60's, they spoke of the 21st century as a time when technology would make life so easy, people would be working 20-hour weeks, and our biggest problem would be figuring out what to do with all our free time.
Still waiting for that one.
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The more technology, the more time taken up. (and more $$$, too!) Cellphones are wonderful. We can reach and be reached if needed. Queen Darl thinks I'm nuts to have one: "I used to love to get in the car and do the weekly shopping. No one could reach me for two hours!" Not so today, right?
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"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven." Ecclesiastes 3:1 Don't believe the lie that you can not do all that God called you to do. Do not believe the lie that you are too busy to do those things well. I have good news for you: God has given you enough time to do everything He wants you to do. Including getting enough sleep. Enough time for you and your husband. Even some time for you.
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Prayer:
Lord, help me to see that Time is not my enemy, but a place in which You have chosen to have me live my earthly life. Help me to begin to see areas that I am wasting the time You have given me, or using it carelessly. Help me to begin to live deliberately.
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Challenge: Meditate on the thought that God has given you enough time to do everything He wants you to do. Set aside a little "time" this week to begin to see some of the time-wasters in your life.

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Barb K 2010

Turn to Him

Turn to me now, while there is still time.
Give me your hearts. Come with fasting,
weeping, and mourning.
Do not tear your clothing in your grief,
but tear your hearts instead.
Return to the Lord your God,
for he is merciful and compassionate,
slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.
Joel 1:12,13
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Recently my eyes were awakened to an issue that I was not even aware I had. One day out of the blue I was assaulted with signs, clues, and discussions pointing to the fact that I had a problem. What was my problem? I waste a lot of time during my day on useless activities. Not only do these activities take away from time with my family but more importantly they take from my time with God. I was not getting as much done around the house like I should have been. Meal planning never quite got done. House cleaning happened when I remembered. In addition to my household chores not being completed like they should have, I was not spending time in the Word on a regular basis. I came up with every excuse in the book as to why I could not read the Bible that day. Well, one day I think God finally had enough with my bad attitude and poor choices. He put articles, scripture, Facebook posts, and even a conference talk in my path telling me that He had had enough. Talk about a slap in the face! Finally I heard Him loud and clear. No more wasted time during my day. Reading His Word is now a priority in my day. Beginning my day in prayer and devotion puts the rest of my day off on the right foot.
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Where is your faith in God? Are you all in or are you dabbling your toes in the sea of Christianity? Does your study of the Word and commitment to prayer ebb and flow like the tides? Today is the day to commit yourself whole-heartedly to God. He wants you all in. Give Him your hearts! Tear your heart open for God and let His love for your pour in. It is so easy to get caught up in the daily grind, the struggles and challenges that bombard us from all angles. Time in the Word is often sacrificed for time on the Internet or time gossiping with friends. Where are your priorities? If you regularly put God and your faith second then you are dabbling your toes in the water. Repent today dear friend. He is waiting.
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Remember time with your Father in Heaven comes in many different shapes, forms, and fashions. Prayer can happen anytime the world around you is quiet. Taking a shower, washing dishes by hand, cleaning the house, driving in the car between your children’s events; these are just a few of the times you can pray and give praise to Him. Download podcasts of the Bible to spend time in the Word while you workout, drive around town, take the dog for a walk, or get things done around the house. If your faith is important to you then there is time in your daily life.
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Prayer:
Dear heavenly Father I come before you today with a repentant heart. Forgive me O Lord for my sinful ways. I have lost sight of what is important in my life. It is You O Father that must come first in my life. Please show me the ways and the times in my life where I can make time for you and Your Word throughout my day. Please give me the strength and wisdom to change my ways so that my daily faith remains renewed, refreshed, and encouraged. All glory and honor is owed to you O Lord. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.
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Challenge:
Can you reduce or eliminate one from your day, every day this week, that takes time away from the duties God has set before you? How many activities in your life detract from God’s work? Make a list it will help visualize the full impact these choices have in your daily life. Talk to your children and spouse about this topic. What are areas they need to work on?

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Alexis M. 2010

Is Your Husband on the Roof?

I am so excited to introduce a new contributor to Fresh Starts. Alexis is a blogger writes the wonderful, heart touching, soul convicting Faithful Rubies Daily Devotionals. You can be blessed daily by visiting http://faithfulrubies.blogspot.com and signing up to receive these gems in your inbox.

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Better to live on a corner of a roof
than share a house with a
quarrelsome wife.
Proverbs 25:25

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Imagine for a minute going on a month long vacation which turns into a life changing move. Not only do you not return to your hometown to say good-bye to friends and family but you also do not return to pack up your house. Instead your husband makes the 2000 mile return trip home to pack up everything and close out your life in your hometown. For over 2 months you and your three kids live with family, a month of which is without your spouse. Imagine the stress, the exhaustion, and the emotional toll that scenario might take on you.
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I do not have to imagine, I am living this reality. What started as a month long vacation to find work for my husband has turned into a life-long move from my hometown of over 30 years. This move had been anticipated but not quite so quickly. Soon after my husband returned home my stress level sky rocketed. I was so stressed that I was bickering with my husband over the phone almost daily. We do not argue very often so I knew something was astray within myself. As I searched for help and guidance in scripture I came across Proverbs 25:25.
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This proverb rings true for me on so many levels. Ponder the depth of this verse for a moment. Think of the impact and relevance it has in your own life and marriage. A quarrelsome wife has not only the power and ability to make her husband leave his home but he might think it better to live on the roof than to live with her. Living in the cold and exposing himself to the elements on top of a hard roof top is better than being in the same room as his cranky wife. Living on a roof top is figurative of course, but you get the point.
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The husband and father is the backbone to every family; the leader, the spiritual guide. His place is not on the roof forced there by an angry wife. Has this ever been you? Be honest with yourself. I know I am guilty! Personally it breaks my heart and brings me to my knees in prayer when I realize I am a thorn in my husband's side. Our husbands do so much for us everyday, we should shower them with thanks and appreciation.
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From 2000 miles away I was forcing my husband to sleep on the roof. Shame on me! Thankfully, I have been able to change my ways and we are no longer arguing. Now my kids and I are eagerly awaiting his safe arrival in our new hometown in a few weeks.
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Prayer:
Dear Heavenly Father, please forgive me of my sins and shortsightedness. O Lord, it is not my desire to be argumentative. I do not enjoy quarreling with my husband. O Father, please give me the strength and wisdom to change my heart, my actions, and my mind. Father I want to align my thoughts and actions according to Your will. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
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Challenge:
What is something you can do today to improve your attitude toward your husband? How can you show him that you appreciate his hard work? Don't just think it, do it!

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Alexis 2010

Autumn's Harvest

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

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Like many other people, autumn is my favorite season. What's not to love? The sights, the sounds, the smells. Looking forward to coming inside for a little hibernation. Just reading the first chapter of Little House in the Big Woods gets me in the mood.
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This week, I am loving the fallen leaves--the satisfying crunch while walking anywhere, the softened colors of the drying leaves, the musty smell everywhere outside.
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I love watching the earth preparing itself for rest. The softened colors everywhere--the grays, browns, and beiges that happen in November *after* the gorgeous display of color in October. The look of bare trees against the sky, mixed in with the evergreens. It's all good, as Martha says.
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I have six children “out of the nest,” and only two teenagers left--and their time is flying by too quickly. The "autumn" of my life is arriving. At 54, though I'm not too concerned about my age, I have to admit that 35 is long past. Most of my child raising years are behind me.
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I have a blog friend who had this to say about that transition: “To everything there is a season. I'm so thankful that autumn is the very season to follow after summer, in God's creation as well as in my life. What a blessed mystery, that something equally/possibly even more special and beautiful, can and will, softly and quietly move into the place of something else long held especially dear, special and beautiful. God is so very good. So kind. So good.”
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That's a wonderful thought. Why shouldn't the "autumn" of my life, just like the autumn of the year, be my very favorite? Sure, my skin is a little dried up just like the leaves (hopefully, I'm not smellin' too musty just yet...) and my hair color is a tad faded-looking. But this is the time of my harvest--looking at the children we raised becoming wonderful adults, the promise of the seedlings we planted coming to fruition. Fulfilling the purposes God planned for them, and, getting me some grandchildren into the bargain!
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Another thing that's apparent at this time of my life is the Wisdom my mother told me I'd get. It's magic! You just keep getting up in the morning, then, one day, all of a sudden you know a few things. A lot of the angst of youth disappears, and you stop sweatin' (at least *some*) of the Small Stuff. I can see as each year passes, Life getting more and more clear. Now, I still worry 'way too much. I thought I'd have it more "together" by this time. I guess I thought I would have conquered all that stuff I don't like about myself. But at least I know that God doesn't hold it against me. He loves me "just the way I am." Really. He DOES.
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So now, for this season, I am going to try to look at my life, as well as what's going on outside, with fresh eyes.
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Prayer:

Dear Father, You have made me for this season, for this time. Help me to see that every season is important in Your eyes. Help me to see with those eyes, what you are doing in my life right now, and treasure each moment.

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Challenge:

If you are one to fret about the passing of summer, or your age, or the swiftness with which your children are growing up, look outside this week with new eyes—those which see the New thing happening. Think about the harvest which *you* are producing for the Lord.
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Barb Kellogg 2009