The Perfect Sin-o-Meter

This article was posted last November on Fresh Starts.  At the time, I was breathing a huge sigh of relief because I thought the Lord was all done with the area I addressed in this writing.  Boy, was I wrong!  He was just getting started.  Our God is so faithful to finish the job, never leaving anything undone or unaddressed.  I pray that He will speak to you again, or for the first time, through this week's Fresh Start.  Jen

This past year has been the most wonderfully difficult time I can remember in my adult years. You might think the words ‘wonderfully’ and ‘difficult’ do not belong in the same sentence, but I can tell you that they certainly do! The Lord has been taking me through the deepest, darkest parts of my heart exposing and rooting out selfishness, unforgiveness, resentment, pride, harshness, anger – the list is long and ugly. I was unaware that most of these things where even in there. Thankfully, the Lord has a handy attribute called Omniscience and He is not afraid to use it.


In His goodness, the Lord has allowed me to see, read, and hear my own ugliness. This year long process came to a head this past month when He directed me to Psalm 19, having me read over and over again how His Word is the perfect sin-o-meter.

Who can understand his errors? Cleanse me from secret faults. Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins; Let them not have dominion over me. Then I shall be blameless, And I shall be innocent of great transgression. Psalm 19:12,13

When I see justification for an offence taken, the Word sees an excuse to set up walls to keep others out. (Proverbs 18:19) When I see a reason to withhold forgiveness, it sees a woman who is willing to receive the precious forgiveness of Jesus but is unwilling to extend that same forgiveness to a peer. (Matt. 18:23-35) When I see a situation that is ripe for sarcasm and anger, He sees a heart that is refusing to live at peace with all men. (Romans 12:18)

I encourage you not to stuff and ignore those nagging feelings that pop up. Trust me on this - I tried to ignore the conviction and it only extended the process, creating more issues along the way. Recognize the niggling for what it is: a warning to be heeded (Psalm 19:11), and the reward for paying attention and taking action is great and worth the pain of facing and dealing with your sin.

When we allow the Lord to work freely in our hearts, the process is usually very uncomfortable. The great thing is that with that pain there is the gain of having a clean heart before Him. The secret faults, the presumptuous sins – none can be hidden from the lamp of God’s Word. When those secret sins are exposed and dealt with the effects are long reaching to our homes, churches, friendships, and workplaces, making the result of the difficult process truly wonderful!

Prayer:
Father, thank You for exposing my sin. Thank You for doing it little by little, bringing me to a place of repentance. Help me to walk in Your ways in every area of my life, never resisting Your good and perfect plan for me.

Challenge:
Read Psalm 19 in its entirety each day this week, focusing especially on verses 7 through 14. Make special note of what the Word of God is. Be careful not to fall into presumptuous sins - things that tend to be given a stamp of approval because, well, we are human after all. Some of those might include your tone of voice with your kids (They made me mad!), your critical spirit over the worship at church (It is just not my style. Why can't we sing more [insert favorite style here]?), your resistance to do something your husband has asked (He knows I hate fish! Why should I have to cook it?). Those justified sins can be the most dangerous and quickly gain dominion over you (Psalm 19:13).
Jen G. 2009

More Than Words

Our words are powerful. With our words we speak blessing or cursing, life or death, joy or hurt. James talked about the tongue in depth in his letter to the Christian Jews.
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James 3:9-12 says, “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.”

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Earlier in verse 1 James says, “We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.” This passage makes it very clear that we ALL stumble in this area. No one is immune from using their mouth to hurt another, intentional or not. Someone who prides themselves on being the sole of gracious words is certain to cause great offence at some point. And yes, I write that from personal experience. My tongue has been the gateway to many an uncomfortable moment, day, and year.

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Along with hurtful words and anger, our tongues can lead us and others into bitterness and unforgiveness, which in turn leads to division in the body of Christ. Last year, I was offended and refused to forgive another. That unforgiveness led to anger and ignoring James’s admonition to be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger. (1:19) As a blogger, I turned to the written word to ‘vent’ my feelings.

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My slope was slippery and as I continued to give a full rein to my tongue, the hurtful words grew and my heart condition deteriorated. My own words were a snare, not only for myself, but for another. My choice to 1.) walk in unforgiveness, 2.) write unkindly, and 3.) bitterly jest about the situation brought about so much more than I ever bargained for. Adding to the whole sorry mess - I caused another child of God to stumble. Praise God that His mercy triumphs over justice (v 12) and a millstone was not tied about my neck!
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Had I simply taken the Lord at His Word and tamed my tongue, so much pain and division would have been avoided. My words brought hurt and division, caused uncomfortable moments for others, and worst of all – caused a dullness in my relationship with the Lord.

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Taming your tongue is so much more than just speaking kindly or not speaking at all. It is choosing to address issues in a godly way as they arise, seeking and extending forgiveness, stopping your mouth from sharing what does not need to be shared (gossip), cutting off course jesting that can hurt, and speaking the truth in love.

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Seek God’s wisdom with your tongue!

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“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.” James 3:17-18
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Prayer:
Father, thank You that my sinful tongue does not define me – Christ’s sacrifice defines me! Thank You for giving me Your Word that speaks wisdom and correction in the area of my words. Help me to use my words, written or spoken, to bring healing and life. Amen
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Challenge:
Keep account of your words this week. Watch for course jesting, sharing unnecessary information, snippiness, pridefulness, slyness, etc. One person might deal with bitter words, while another deals with flattering words which Proverbs warns about. Read the book of James and allow the Holy Spirit to rightly divide the Word of Truth in your heart today.
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Jen 2010

My Ugly Pet

Due to a very busy week, I am reposting an old favorite of mine. I pray that it ministers to you!

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I have a pet. This pet demands my attention and sucks the energy right out of me; it pains my heart and causes me much shame and guilt as I constantly have to clean up after it. In spite of this, I sort of love this pet. It must be love considering the manner in which I treat it. I snuggle with it and feed it and hide it from exposure. When it is threatened with death I do just about everything in my power to keep it with me. I pray for it to die quietly with no pain so I do not have to make the decision to put it out of its misery. Sometimes I even hope we can go on living together always, avoiding the pain of giving up something I have grown comfortable with in spite of its irritation to me.
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The name of this hideous, ugly, time consuming pet is…SIN. Sin certainly becomes a pet. Worry, overeating, gossip, discontentedness, resistance to authority, anger, criticalness, holding offences and a myriad of other things demand our time and energy each day. The Scriptures are clear that these things are against God’s plan for us and yet we hang on tight to them many times. We do so because it is comfortable. Let’s be totally honest. We would not be continuing in these patterns of unchecked sin if we did not get some feeling that we liked from them. Sometimes sin is fun, but in the end it pays poorly. Proverbs 14:12
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If you are not certain what your personal ugly pet is – and I promise you that EVERYONE has at least one – call out to the Lord as David did in Psalm 139:23 and 24. “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.” The Lord will show you your sin because He wants you to be holy as He is holy. He wants you to live a life of freedom and peace. Without His holiness we cannot be effective in our witness to our families and the world around us.
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Once we identify our not-so-cute Kujo, how do we go about killing it? God’s Word tells us that, “Those who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.” Proverbs 28:13 We must first confess that we have these closely held critters and then we must turn from them. We have a choice and making the right choice has a wonderful outcome – mercy, freedom and righteous living. (Romans 6:16) We do not need to be in bondage to our sin. If we belong to Christ His life giving Spirit has freed us from the power of sin! (Romans 8:2) His Word promises that “…letting the Spirit control your mind leads to life and peace.” Romans 8:6 So…go slay that snarling pet sin and live in freedom!
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Prayer:
Father, please show me the ugly pet sins in my spiritual life. Give me the strength and determination I need to put them out of my heart and life. Thank You for the conviction of the Holy Spirit and Your patient love. Amen.
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Challenge:
Ask a friend or your husband to help you identify ugly pet sins. Ask them to hold you accountable and then be open to their observations.
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Jen 2007

Are You a Lemon?

We had a car once that needed to have constant repair service. If it was not one thing, it was another. Parts were always breaking and needing to be replaced or treated in some way. It was expensive; it was high maintenance. It was expensive and frustrating to own such a car! Most of us call those kinds of cars lemons.

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I have found that people are very similar in a way. So the question is: are YOU a high or low maintenance kind of person? That is a pretty scary question isn’t it? None of us want to admit that we might be a high maintenance person. How do we know what a high maintenance person looks like? Here are some clues:

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• they are focused on their “feelings or emotions” (what others say to them, how they say it to them)
• they need constant verbal praise to carry on whatever task they are doing
• they are often “wounded” by others
• offended easily
• always need to “talk” about something that is bothering them
• pout to get attention and are angry if they do not get the attention

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In other words, high maintenance people are roller coaster personalities and emotionally exhausting to relate with because they require so much attention. I think you get the picture.

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Does this describe you? If it does, don’t despair! The word of God gives us some very practical solutions to help us change. In Colossians 3: 1–5 we are told to set our minds on things above and not on the things on the earth. We are told to consider the members of our earthly bodies as dead. Skip down to verses 8–17 and we see what we are to put off and what to put on. I think the key here is to practice the "put ons" starting in verse 12. These "put ons" are a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other…..just as the Lord forgave you. Verse 14 tells us to put on love.

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If we would apply these few verses our lives would begin to be transformed. Not only do they help those us who may be high maintenance ourselves to overcome, but it will help those of us who have to deal with high maintenance people treat them with love and kindness. God is amazing isn’t He?
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Prayer: Lord, the last thing I want is for others to feel like I am a high maintenance person. Please help me to overcome and to grow up into Christ in all things. Help me as I practice the put offs and put ons listed in Colossians. 3. Teach me to set my mind on things above and to make Jesus Christ Lord of my life in all ways. Thank you.

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Challenge: Begin to take notice of how you relate to others and ask the Lord to open your eyes to your status of maintenance requirements.
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Sherry 2010

Hand Over the Horn

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. 1 Peter 5:6-8
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My husband and I have a friend who is, in his words, an instrument repairman. In actuality he is a very well known and respected brass instrument designer and restoration specialist. Let’s just say that some of the horns Chuck works on cost more than both of our vehicles. Combined. While visiting with him this week, he was telling me about some of the professional musicians who bring their horns to him for repair. He reaches for the horn, they pull it back. He reaches again, and they pull it back. They want to tell him what is wrong with the horn, hoping he can make suggestions and they will not have to actually surrender their instrument. Finally, he tells them to, “Hand over the horn.” He reminds them that he will forget more about that horn than they will ever even know about it and the only way for it to be repaired is for them to give it to him. After they relinquish their instrument he then deals with their pacing and giving advice while they look over his shoulder as he works.
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Sometimes, I am like those worried instrumentalists. I have a problem that I am holding close and watching over. I want everything fixed, and yet I am afraid to hand it to the One who can restore and make all things new. When I do finally ‘let go and let God’ I insist on putting in my two cents on how He should handle things.

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This refusal to give my problem to the Lord is really a lack of trust. Insisting on helping Him when I do finally ‘kinda’ hand it over shows an abundance of pride and impatience; pride in my own abilities and solutions and impatience that things are not working fast enough to suit me.

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The end of a matter is better than its beginning, and patience is better than pride. Ecclesiastes 7:8

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I would do well to take Chuck the brass man’s advice to his clients: Hand over the horn, sit down in that chair and keep quiet. When I do those things I can then watch the Master Craftsman and Restorer do His perfect work. And what a beautiful thing it is to behold!

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The LORD is my strength and my shield; My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped; Therefore my heart greatly rejoices, And with my song I will praise Him. Psalm 28:7

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Prayer:
Father God, Creator of all and Fixer of broken things, thank You for showing abundant patience with me. Please help me to hand over my horns to You. Amen.

Challenge:
What are you holding onto? Is it a child in rebellion, a devastating illness, an unpaid bill, a broken down car, a fractured friendship? Whatever it is, I encourage you to lay it down firmly at the feet of the Lord. Then sit down and let Him work; only saying and doing what He instructs you to do.
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Jen 2010

Ugly Pride

Let’s talk about pride.

According to Webster’s 1828 Dictionary, pride is an inordinate self-esteem; an unreasonable conceit of one's own superiority in talents, beauty, wealth, accomplishments, rank or elevation in office, which manifests itself in lofty airs, distance, reserve, and often in contempt of others.

At times I am a walking definition of this ugly word. Proverbs 13:10 says, “By pride comes nothing but strife, but with the well-advised is wisdom.” There are times when my home is filled with strife. Often that strife originates with me when I become angry when a little person does not follow my instructions. Instead of reacting in anger, I should be grieved in my heart because my child is walking in disobedience that will affect his or her relationship with the Lord. My pride has elevated my inconvenience over the holiness of the Lord. If I am well-advised (spending time in the Word), I will have the wisdom to avoid the pride and in return, the strife.

Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? James 4:1

The Word is crystal clear on the source of all arguments and strife. It all comes from pride. My personal desire for pleasure (what makes my life easier, what makes me comfortable, what makes me look good) causes fights and quarrels. Of course, my family also contributes to this atmosphere. However, I have a responsibility to respond in a godly way. Once again, if I am being well-advised by the Scriptures I will know how to respond and handle the situations that arise with my children and husband. Pride is a personal issue for which I must take responsibility, working towards walking in humility like Jesus.

Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up. James 4:10

Prayer:
Father, please forgive me for walking in pride, seeking in my own way and comfort. Help me to be aware of my part in strife that arises in my home. I desire to be a woman of peace. Amen

Challenge:
Keep your eyes open for pride in your life this week. Look at the definition above carefully. Make note of all the ways pride manifests itself: lofty airs, distancing oneself, reserve, lofty looks. The next time you have a spat with your husband, stop and examine your motives and reactions. Remember, all fights come from pride. If you die to yourself, there is no way an argument can continue! Be prepared, dying to yourself is painful and frustrating, but the end result is wonderful!

Jen 2010