Up until our last baby’s birth in 2003, I had pretty uneventful pregnancies and recovery times. All that changed in the months following our sweet baby girl’s arrival. My husband and mom had been trying to get me to acknowledge the severe baby blues I was experiencing, but I was trying to be tough. As tough as you can be under the covers in three day old pajamas while your nine year old feeds the other three mobile children. Baby Rilla’s pediatrician and nurses also picked up on what I had been hiding from most people and addressed it with me. I was suffering from post partum depression. Dr. Ann gave me permission (I somehow felt I needed it) to seek medical care for this very real medical condition. She also mailed me a beautiful book of Scripture and a letter urging me to continue reading the Word and praying while I was being treated with medication.
*
Six years later I still struggle, primarily during the cold, dark winters of Northeast Ohio. This winter has been better than last, but it has still been a struggle. I would like to share some things that I do to help lighten the heavy load of depression.
*
One thing that I tend to shy away from when I am feeling depressed, is my personal blog. My friends can all tell you that when more than three days go by without a post, something must certainly be wrong. So, I make myself blog almost daily about my “shade of blue”, trying to remain open and transparent. Being honest and humble about it helps me to remember my human frailty. When I am conscious of my weakness I am even more aware of the Lord’s strength. It is only through Him and His promises that I am able to push through and do the next thing.
*
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up.” James 4:10
*
During my blue times I also work to adjust my schedule so that I am not weighed down with outings and commitments. I stick close to home and focus on the Lord and family. Psalm 37:7a says, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him…” The Psalmist encourages us again, “Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.” (Psalm 27:14) I use my ‘down time’ to look up and draw closer to the Father. Being too busy is also a trigger for me, so walking out this part of the plan is not difficult for me!
*
While I am hunkering down and drawing near to the Lord, I must keep in mind that it is not okay to stay home and keep my shades drawn and the phone off the hook. As much as I strongly dislike interaction with others during these times, I NEED that interaction. My family and friends encourage me and pray for me. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 is a favorite reminder to me.
*
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
*
Finding a way to serve others helps to keep my focus outward and not inward. I might bake for a friend or send a card to someone I know is suffering far more than I am. My act of service might not be as time consuming or big as when I am feeling healthy, but it is still an opportunity for me to honor and prefer others.
*Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:10
*As I write this devotional, I am in the midst of a blue time. I am not quite to the Madame Blueberry level, but I came pretty close a couple of time this past week. I write from the self-preaching I have been doing in my own life. My prayer is that it encourages you in your own time of difficulty and struggle.
*
Prayer:
Father God, thank You that You are the God of all hope and comfort, peace and joy. My changing feelings do not change the truth of who You are! Thank You for the promises in Your Word to encourage me to look up. Amen
*
Challenge:
I encourage you to be open and transparent about your struggles with depression. Be smart, however. Choose a friend that you know will direct you to the Word and will keep you in prayer as you consider medical intervention. Be sensitive about who you ask. Try not to pick someone who is in the midst of their own battle. You certainly do not want to overwhelm them even more! You could, however, remember to pray for them faithfully as an act of service.
*
Please do not feel as if you are somehow not a good Christian if you can not get over the hump of depression. Pray Psalm 139:23 and 24, allowing the Lord to search your heart for any sin that needs to be dealt with. If the Holy Spirit does not show you anything, make an appointment with your doctor for a check up. Many forms of depression are medical or weather/light related in nature. And remember, just because you might need a little pill for now does not necessarily mean you will need it forever.
*
Jen 2010
*
Six years later I still struggle, primarily during the cold, dark winters of Northeast Ohio. This winter has been better than last, but it has still been a struggle. I would like to share some things that I do to help lighten the heavy load of depression.
*
One thing that I tend to shy away from when I am feeling depressed, is my personal blog. My friends can all tell you that when more than three days go by without a post, something must certainly be wrong. So, I make myself blog almost daily about my “shade of blue”, trying to remain open and transparent. Being honest and humble about it helps me to remember my human frailty. When I am conscious of my weakness I am even more aware of the Lord’s strength. It is only through Him and His promises that I am able to push through and do the next thing.
*
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up.” James 4:10
*
During my blue times I also work to adjust my schedule so that I am not weighed down with outings and commitments. I stick close to home and focus on the Lord and family. Psalm 37:7a says, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him…” The Psalmist encourages us again, “Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.” (Psalm 27:14) I use my ‘down time’ to look up and draw closer to the Father. Being too busy is also a trigger for me, so walking out this part of the plan is not difficult for me!
*
While I am hunkering down and drawing near to the Lord, I must keep in mind that it is not okay to stay home and keep my shades drawn and the phone off the hook. As much as I strongly dislike interaction with others during these times, I NEED that interaction. My family and friends encourage me and pray for me. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 is a favorite reminder to me.
*
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
*
Finding a way to serve others helps to keep my focus outward and not inward. I might bake for a friend or send a card to someone I know is suffering far more than I am. My act of service might not be as time consuming or big as when I am feeling healthy, but it is still an opportunity for me to honor and prefer others.
*Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:10
*As I write this devotional, I am in the midst of a blue time. I am not quite to the Madame Blueberry level, but I came pretty close a couple of time this past week. I write from the self-preaching I have been doing in my own life. My prayer is that it encourages you in your own time of difficulty and struggle.
*
Prayer:
Father God, thank You that You are the God of all hope and comfort, peace and joy. My changing feelings do not change the truth of who You are! Thank You for the promises in Your Word to encourage me to look up. Amen
*
Challenge:
I encourage you to be open and transparent about your struggles with depression. Be smart, however. Choose a friend that you know will direct you to the Word and will keep you in prayer as you consider medical intervention. Be sensitive about who you ask. Try not to pick someone who is in the midst of their own battle. You certainly do not want to overwhelm them even more! You could, however, remember to pray for them faithfully as an act of service.
*
Please do not feel as if you are somehow not a good Christian if you can not get over the hump of depression. Pray Psalm 139:23 and 24, allowing the Lord to search your heart for any sin that needs to be dealt with. If the Holy Spirit does not show you anything, make an appointment with your doctor for a check up. Many forms of depression are medical or weather/light related in nature. And remember, just because you might need a little pill for now does not necessarily mean you will need it forever.
*
Jen 2010
2 comments:
thanks for sharing. May the Lord continue to keep and guide you during those moments.
Zinnada<><
Thanks for being so 'real' Jen.
You are a blessing!
Love,
Dawn
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