Thin Skinned

"People with good sense are slow to anger, and it is their glory to overlook an offense." -Proverbs 19:11

Every now and then, one of our chickens will lay an egg that has no shell. Instead of a shell, the egg will literally be only a thin, leathery membrane of skin. For some reason or other, the egg didn't become calcified before being laid. With no shell, it doesn't take much to destroy the delicate innards of the egg.

It is easy to become offended. It's second nature to allow our innards to become scrambled by life's abrasive and abusive ways. We need to be prepared for the fact that our enemy is merciless and is seeking to destroy us. We must not be thin-skinned! We must put on the armor of God to protect our precious hearts. One of the greatest ways to protect ourselves is through basic obedience to God's Word and self-control.
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"Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control." -Proverbs 25:28

Ruling our spirits and submitting them to God's ways protects us from most of what the enemy will throw at us. Life will happen, but how will we react? Men will betray, and many will hurt us without even trying. What will we do?

"For if you forgive others their offenses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; but if you do not forgive others their offenses, your heavenly Father will not forgive yours." -Matthew 6:14&15

Forgiveness protects us from not only destroying ourselves with bitterness, but also from the wrath of God. Forgiveness is like a shell protecting us. God will not forgive us our offenses if we do not forgive others. If a holy God can overlook our offenses when we humble ourselves and repent, who are we to not do the same to fellow people when we are no better than they are?

Let us not live like the "reject" eggs from my chickens. They are formless, floppy, and vulnerable to nearly every provocation. Instead, let us be conformed to the image of Christ who bore no bitterness despite the fact that he was the most wrongfully assaulted person ever. Let us not be weak and floppy, but strengthened and renewed by waiting upon the Lord and exercising ourselves spiritually so we are fit enough to do battle for others in the name of our Lord. As we bear the name and standard of Christ's righteousness, may we be found without chinks in our armor due to our own lack of self-government.
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Dearest friend, overlook offenses and rule your spirit. Our just Lord will surely settle all accounts and make all things right. We believe He is good and trustworthy, so let us act like it. (Psalm 17)

 

Prayer:

Father God, thank You for giving me the tools to escape the temptation of offence.  Please help me to guard my heart from a root of bitterness and resentment.  Those things do not honor you in any way.  Amen.

 

Challenge:

Search your heart for any offences you might have taken. Spend time in prayer asking the Lord to clear your mind and heart.  Seek godly, trustworthy counsel if you simply are not making headway in this area.  The Lord wants us to walk with pure hearts filled with His love and mercy.

 

Adrienne M. 2010 - Provision Farm

More Than Words

Our words are powerful. With our words we speak blessing or cursing, life or death, joy or hurt. James talked about the tongue in depth in his letter to the Christian Jews.
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James 3:9-12 says, “With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.”

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Earlier in verse 1 James says, “We all stumble in many ways. If anyone is never at fault in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to keep his whole body in check.” This passage makes it very clear that we ALL stumble in this area. No one is immune from using their mouth to hurt another, intentional or not. Someone who prides themselves on being the sole of gracious words is certain to cause great offence at some point. And yes, I write that from personal experience. My tongue has been the gateway to many an uncomfortable moment, day, and year.

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Along with hurtful words and anger, our tongues can lead us and others into bitterness and unforgiveness, which in turn leads to division in the body of Christ. Last year, I was offended and refused to forgive another. That unforgiveness led to anger and ignoring James’s admonition to be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger. (1:19) As a blogger, I turned to the written word to ‘vent’ my feelings.

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My slope was slippery and as I continued to give a full rein to my tongue, the hurtful words grew and my heart condition deteriorated. My own words were a snare, not only for myself, but for another. My choice to 1.) walk in unforgiveness, 2.) write unkindly, and 3.) bitterly jest about the situation brought about so much more than I ever bargained for. Adding to the whole sorry mess - I caused another child of God to stumble. Praise God that His mercy triumphs over justice (v 12) and a millstone was not tied about my neck!
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Had I simply taken the Lord at His Word and tamed my tongue, so much pain and division would have been avoided. My words brought hurt and division, caused uncomfortable moments for others, and worst of all – caused a dullness in my relationship with the Lord.

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Taming your tongue is so much more than just speaking kindly or not speaking at all. It is choosing to address issues in a godly way as they arise, seeking and extending forgiveness, stopping your mouth from sharing what does not need to be shared (gossip), cutting off course jesting that can hurt, and speaking the truth in love.

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Seek God’s wisdom with your tongue!

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“But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.” James 3:17-18
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Prayer:
Father, thank You that my sinful tongue does not define me – Christ’s sacrifice defines me! Thank You for giving me Your Word that speaks wisdom and correction in the area of my words. Help me to use my words, written or spoken, to bring healing and life. Amen
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Challenge:
Keep account of your words this week. Watch for course jesting, sharing unnecessary information, snippiness, pridefulness, slyness, etc. One person might deal with bitter words, while another deals with flattering words which Proverbs warns about. Read the book of James and allow the Holy Spirit to rightly divide the Word of Truth in your heart today.
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Jen 2010

The Righteous Gavel

Psalm 37:7-9
Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret – it leads only to evil. For evil men will be cut off, but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.

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Shortly after my cousin was murdered this past November, I was asked a series of normal culture questions which began with the “how” and “why’s.” There was one question in particular that I recognized as a test from God. This question was posed by a complete stranger who struck up a conversation with me in a check-out line. She had noticed the amount of sympathy cards that I was purchasing. I shared briefly what had happened and that my cousin came from a large family and I was looking to comfort them all in some small way. She went on to ask; “Aren’t you really angry, I’m sure you all just want justice!” I remember my response quite vividly. I told her, “Well, of course I want justice; but I believe that the final word always comes from GOD Himself and I’m trusting in whatever He allows.” Now, I wish you could have seen her face. She looked at me like I was an alien from another planet. She responded “How can you have that kind of response, I would want to kill someone!”
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Please understand this, my response that day was not a human response at all, but rather it was a biblical one. I was kind of shocked by it myself. I explained to the woman in the store that “anger” is exactly what led to the death of my cousin and that I was trying to be careful not to go there. I further explained that “agitation” was allowed to turn into anger and then a choice was made to respond to the anger which resulted in the act of murder. We both finally concluded that there is a real lesson within these kinds of tragedies. Do I believe these men set out to kill my cousin? No, but I do believe they all underestimated the power of anger. Do I want fair justice, you bet I do, and I’m praying for it!
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The truth is it’s often very difficult to wait upon the Lord when things appear unfair, but we need to do just that. My cousin’s death was unfair, and at present it appears these young men are getting away with murder. However, it is important to understand that what appears to be a success or a blessing at times, is simply a temporal illusion. The real reward will be an eternal inheritance that awaits those who have placed their trust in Jesus Christ and have repented from sin. When it appears that justice has not been served, rest assured GOD alone has the final word. He promises to right every wrong; His Holy Word says just that.
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King David tells us in the Psalms that “the Lord knows the days of the upright; and their inheritance shall be forever.” It is quite possible that the men that killed my cousin may not get the sentence we believe they should get here on earth. Nevertheless, we are told not to envy people who appear to be receiving an award on earth. Our true reward comes in heaven for those who surrender their sin to GOD. May these young men do just that before it’s too late.
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Prayer:

Father thank You that You are the God of justice. Please help me to remember that what might seem unfair to my earthly eyes is all taken in by You. You see all and know all and will bring justice in Your perfect timing. Help me to rest in You and Your judicial hand. We also pray that the men involved in this crime would take responsibility for their actions. Lord You were there; You saw it all, and we ask that You reveal all the facts necessary to bring about rightful justice. If possible I also pray these families can avoid a long drawn out trial. In Your Son’s Name we pray. Amen.
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Challenge:

Keep your eyes on the eternal prize of Jesus Christ, the Author and Finisher of our faith. He is the One who will bring vindication and truth in all circumstances. Guard your heart against vengeful feelings and resentful attitudes.
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Pam C. 2010

Bits, Bullies, and Bleeding Backsides

I am pleased to introduce a new contributor. Adrienne is a personal friend of mine whose writings spur me to deeper thinking and reflection. Enjoy more of Adrienne’s thoughts at Provision Farm.

Don't let love be a mere outward show...love one another devotedly and with brotherly love; and set examples for each other in showing respect." Romans 12:9, 10.
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Recently, our family acquired a third horse. To recap, we purchased an unbroken mare with a miniature horse buddy about a month ago. The unbroken mare has been coming along so beautifully in her training, that we were eager to have another full sized horse so that my husband, Daniel, and I could ride together. As it has been, Daniel's been riding the 'unbroken' mare every day with no bit and bridle and has successfully gotten her to obey his commands.
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Our newest horse is another mare that is white and fully broken. She's very sweet, but timid. Herein lies the problem. Our mare that we had previously has lashed out at her with a vengeance. She is deeply preoccupied with being the 'head mare' of the barn and denies access to it for the white mare. Feeding time has become a nightmare. The very first day here, the poor darling sustained a terrible kick to her rear end resulting in a cut in a very delicate place. This cut is still healing.
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Today, God spoke to me about this issue and said it's a problem in the church. He said that there are many who have submitted to Him because He is holy and trustworthy and is the only one who can sort out the mess of their life. However, these same people can still retain bitterness and a biting venom toward other people. We, brothers and sisters, are deeply imperfect. We hurt each other; often when we don't mean to. We can either be preoccupied with 'staying on top' of others or we can submit to not only God, but each other. My mare accepted me as master because I'm good to her, but she will not yield to a fellow horse.
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Paul goes on to say in Romans,” Be sensitive to each other's needs--don't think yourselves better than others, but make humble people your friends. Don't be conceited. Repay no one evil for evil, but try to do what everyone regards as good. If possible, and to the extent that it depends on you, live in peace with all people. Never seek revenge, my friends; instead, leave that to God's anger."
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My white mare is indeed 'turning the other cheek'. As many times as the other mare bites her and chases her, she simply moves along and minds her own business. How often are we the catty and immature one picking fights? And how often are we the submissive and docile one that keeps their nose clean?
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Today, I hit a breaking point; as one day the Lord will stop tolerating the evil that we endure at the hands of malicious or just immature people. I took the unbroken mare's buddy from the pen so she lost her sense of security. I put the miniature in with my sheep and goats and then stood back to watch. Her malice grew toward the white horse, so I had to step in further. I put her in a stall (which I never do) and I began to groom and pet and treat the white horse in front of her. She pawed the ground angrily and leapt at the dividing gate. I just calmly doted on the white horse and let her jealous foe watch. Then, I led the white one to the dividing wall so they could stand nose to nose. I held her there and forced them to 'hash it out' in an environment that no one could get hurt. Each of them sniffed and moved their muzzles up and down each other's necks. Often, one of them would open their mouths to bite, so the other would whinny and kick. They, therefore, set the proper boundaries with each other and are safe to be left alone with each other now. Beautiful success! God is indeed teaching me much about people through animals.
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I exhort you, dear friend, to prefer others above yourself. Instead of chasing someone out into the rain and mud, stand aside and give them your portion. Instead of taking offense at someone else's insult to you (whether intentional or not), be the grownup one and 'show the example of respect' by overlooking the offense. By the strength we receive by being sons and daughters of the Most High, we can do this. God will step in and level the playing field because He is just. If you suffer any persecution, you have an ally and His name is Christ. Stand with Christ and stand blameless in front of a Holy God. To honor God, we must honor each other. We receive power through praise to submit to the Lord's will toward each other. Oh, and without coincidence, the white horse's name is Praise.
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Prayer:
Father, You are good and worthy of praise! Please help me in this hard area. Preferring others does not come naturally to me. I want my own way and do not want to give others my portion. Help me to walk in the Spirit of Christ, honoring You in heart and actions. Amen.
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Challenge:
This week, search the Scriptures for verses dealing with being easily offended, becoming bitter, and holding grudges. When opportunities arise for you to take offence, take a step back and make the choice not to fall into the trap of the enemy.
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Adrienne Michelson 2010